“[Jesus] answered, ‘Because of your little faith [your lack of trust and confidence in the power of God]; for I assure you and most solemnly say to you, if you have [living] faith the size of a mustard seed, you will say to this mountain, “Move from here to there,” and [if it is God’s will] it will move; and nothing will be impossible for you.’” (Amplified Bible Matthew 17:20)
Years ago our eldest daughter did something worthy of discipline. She was given a choice between losing two weeks allowance and doing the chore of her father’s choice. Her choice surprised me: she chose to give up her allowance.
When I asked her why she chose to give up allowance instead of performing a single chore she replied, “Because daddy would tell me to clean out the garbage can or something disgusting like that.” That would have been a disgusting job, especially since it was Summer. But I knew her father would never ask her to do something like that. In this matter, she didn’t trust her father.
And I realize that the fears I struggle with stem from a lack of trust in my Father, in You.
I still have times of doubt, I still struggle to believe You will fell my Goliaths, still waver in confident expectation that either from or through whatever battle is at hand, You will deliver me. I still struggle to wholeheartedly trust You, to believe that even if I was given the adult version of cleaning out a stinky trash can in the heat of Summer, it would somehow be okay.
Forgive me, Father.
O heavenly Father, Creator of the universe and all that is in it, Who knit me together in my mother’s womb*, help me wholeheartedly trust You. Help me have the faith to tell this mountain of fear to move.
*See Psalm 139:13